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Writer's pictureAmara Russell

Confidence Flex



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Confidence for SingleMi has been a struggle. Once being what I considered a marriage champion now experiencing the equivalent to switching sports. Imagine playing football, winning championships, scoring goal after goal no matter what your position was, then all the sudden your career ends! Now you have been a MVP in one sport but now you switched the track, this tests your speed, endurance and sheer will. I am embracing the position of singleness because as I mentioned before, God created singleness first. This has taken much retraining in my mind and major behavior modifications. I have to look at learning to become comfortable in my singleness just like training for a new sport. One step at time.

Photo Credit: Lindsay Henwood


I call this building my confidence flex. When you first do a workout, the next day usually you are quite sore, and it hurts to work those same areas out back-to-back. It doesn’t feel good at the time but, your heart, lungs and muscles are getting stronger each time. So, the things I sometimes battle such as loneliness, self-confidence, and self-care are just like muscles. The more I use them and work them out the stronger they will become.

Photo Credit: Canva


So, don’t mind me when you see my selfies or me exercising myself awareness, it’s a flex but not a flex. I must push myself just like in the gym to pick up those thoughts, those words and those actions and say, “Hey girl, you’re awesome!” “You deserve the best and you deserve to be loved correctly.” Many times, it comes natural for others to love themselves in this manner, it’s effortless but shout out to the people like me, who feel like this is the run on the elliptical at an incline of the Nevada mountain. It’s hard work but it must be done!

I’m building a new person from the inside out, a total body makeover is underway from my eating and sleeping habits, to what I feed my spirit, to the company I keep, to the words I speak to myself, all the way to the thoughts I think. This is no easy task, but I want a strong core, not the six pack you immediately imaged but a confident, solid woman. No longer concerned of the way someone feels about me just being me. Confident in my own skin that the sensitive to words and abandonment will no longer pierce as deeply as before. Muscles have memory and the more you work out you don’t need as much recovery time as when you first began.

Photo Credit: Canva


Philippians 1:6 being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.

Photo Credit: Kelly Sikkema


God made me, he started it and he’s going to finish it. Until then, I’m flexin. It’s the confident flex for me!


Single Mi

Photo Credit: Jamal Bennison

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